Teeing off in the Afterlife: Mini-Golf Funeral Home Unveiled in Illinois

People have a profound affection for miniature golf. Annually, countless individuals from all over the world navigate through a limitless variety of challenges in their quest to claim bragging rights.

Nonetheless, only a handful of players would categorize it as a passion worth sacrificing their lives for. Nevertheless, at a distinctive location in Illinois, death has become an ordinary occurrence on the golf course.

Welcome to Ahlgrim Acres, a macabre mini-golf experience buried underneath a funeral home.

Origins

Roger Ahlgrim visited the recently built premises of Ahlgrim Family Funeral Services in 1964. The funeral home, situated in Palatine, a tranquil suburb of Chicago, was established by his grandfather, Arthur Ahlgrim, back in 1892.

During his exploration of the building, Roger stumbled upon a spacious basement. Although it lacked windows and seemed impractical for funeral-related operations, he quickly devised a way to make the most of this unique space.

Over the following years, Ahlgrim and his sole employee meticulously charted and constructed a comprehensive nine-hole course. With the intention of facilitating his children and the local neighborhood, within a span of ten years, it evolved into an integral part of "the community room," featuring a full-size shuffleboard court, a ping pong table, a bumper pool table, and a foosball table that Ahlgrim himself hand-built during his teenage years.

The course taking shape, in 1968.

Ahlgrim FFS / Facebook

Today, Jonathan Gwizdala, a fifth-generation Ahlgrim, upholds his grandfather's legacy as one of the funeral directors, while also cherishing his fondness for miniature golf.

"When he established the funeral home in this location, he had ample space available. The entire basement was situated below, which obviously cannot accommodate funeral ceremonies.

Mini-macabre

The community room, including Ahlgrim Acres, is strictly closed during funeral services.

The course, available at no cost and undergoing constant development for the past 59 years, embraces its distinctive setting. With a macabre theme and unsettling lighting in the absence of natural light, the eerie characteristics are evident right from the start.

Located within a sand trap on the first hole, you will find Roger Ahlgrims' personal sculpting skull from mortuary school, where he acquired the skill to create lifelike facial features.

Roger Ahlgrim's personal sculpting skull is on the first hole.

Jonathan Gwizdala, an embalmer, holds a deep fascination for one particular aspect. Among his cherished attractions, surpassing those with a dynamic guillotine, a life-sized figure resembling the grim reaper, and even a water trap, is Ahlgrims' very own miniature mausoleum.

The players must navigate around the small gravestones, each one etched with names and corresponding dates of death. However, what sets these gravestones apart is that they bear the names of the Ahlgrim Family Funeral Services' living funeral directors. One particular headstone belonging to Gwizdalas reveals that he has an expected lifespan until 2050, a date personally selected by his grandfather.

Ahlgrim Acres' very own "cryptorium."

Jonathan Gwizdala

“Fairway to heaven”

Host to thousands of rounds each year, Ahlgrim Acres has become woven into the fabric of the neighborhood.

The community room's decor is a heartfelt tribute to the history and culture of the village. Neon signs from bygone barber shops, road signs, flags, and other local keepsakes collected over the years serve as a striking contrast to the unsettling theme of the course located in the basement's center.

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The addition of retro arcade video games has made the room a popular choice for kids parties, with Gwizdala often hosting his own children's birthday celebrations there. The community room also serves as a venue for church and civic forums, Boy Scout meetings, and a monthly book club with a horror theme.

However, Ahlgrim Acres has gained a reputation that extends beyond the local area. Mini-golf enthusiasts and travelers from near and far who are interested in exploring the unique and unusual attractions of the state have visited the course. Many have learned about it through regional and even international media coverage.

Numerous articles and references adorn the walls of the community room, encompassing a portion of the 2011 edition of "Ripleys Believe It or Not" annual publication, and even the reverse side of a Go-Gurt yogurt package, where Ahlgrim Acres was the solution to a trivia query.

While the course continues to be complimentary for everyone, a diverse selection of merchandise can be acquired for a nominal fee. The assortment includes shirts, badges, and even an exclusive golf ball-shaped urn from Ahlgrim Acres, appropriately engraved with the phrase "fairway to heaven."