Sara Evans Shares the Journey of Reconciliation with Jay Barker Following His Domestic Violence Arrest

Sara Evans Addresses Husband Jay Barker s Arrest After Their Reconciliation

Sara Evans, Jay Barker. Rick Diamond/Getty Images

Sara Evans recently opened up about getting back together with her husband Harry “Jay” Barker following his arrest for domestic violence two years ago. On the latest episode of her podcast “Diving in Deep with Sara Evans” on Thursday, March 21, the 53-year-old singer shared that they reconciled after she had initially filed for divorce almost three years ago.

I want to make it clear that I am not encouraging anyone to stay in a relationship where deep down they know they need to leave. It's important for every woman to listen to her instincts and do what is best for herself. I believe I have followed my gut in my own situation.

In an upcoming album called Unbroke, I will be sharing my experiences, both good and bad, with Barker.

Evans and Barker's relationship made headlines in January 2022 when Barker was charged with felony aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. He was accused of trying to hit a car that Evans was in with his own car. However, Barker later pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of reckless endangerment and was placed on one year of probation.

According to Evans, she and Barker separated in April 2021 after being married for 13 years. In January 2022, they met for lunch and ended up having a verbal argument. Later that day, Evans and one of her daughters went to a friend's house, and Barker was waiting outside when they left.

"It was a really scary experience for all of us, especially my child who was with me," she shared on a recent podcast. "We were driving with a friend towards our driveway when [Jay] got into a heated argument with my child. It was the first time she had seen that side of him, and it really frightened her."

"After the argument, he quickly got into his truck and started reversing at a high speed. Although I knew Jay and wasn't as scared, my child was terrified. She thought he was going to crash into our car, heading straight towards us. She was afraid she was about to witness something terrible or, at the very least, an accident where his truck would hit the side of our car where I was sitting in the front seat."

The daughter of the country singer phoned the police, prompting Barker to depart from the location. (Evans has daughters Audrey, 19, and Olivia, 21, as well as son Avery, 24, with her ex-husband Craig Schelske.)

Sara Evans Addresses Husband Jay Barker s Arrest After Their Reconciliation

Sara Evans shared a distressing experience where she felt ashamed and foolish while her child was scared. She believed that a man in a truck was trying to back up quickly to identify who she was with, possibly thinking she was with another man. This caused her child to scream in fear, unsure of the man's intentions. Evans was grateful that the situation did not escalate further.

After Barker was arrested, Evans decided to stop all communication. She felt overwhelmed by the constant calls and couldn't believe she was going through this again with her children. She expressed, "I've lost the love of my life."

Months later, Barker reached out to Evans with a text message. He acknowledged that others advised against contacting her but reminded her, "You are still my wife."

The musician recognized that not everyone would support her decision to reconcile with Barker.

She mentioned, "A lot of women will judge me and want to judge me. When he said, ‘But you are still my wife,’ I don’t know. I just melted because I thought, ‘I am still your wife, and we can talk if we want to. We’re both adults.’ So I texted him back and I think I just said something short and sweet like, ‘How are you? I’m on the road.’ And we sort of tiptoed back to each other."

Evans kept her reconciliation with Barker a secret from her children at first. She also mentioned how she suggested that Barker attend therapy and marriage counseling with her before moving forward.

She reflected, “I didn’t want to go through another divorce and start over. I imagined myself alone, missing him, and regretting not trying harder. It wasn’t until I filed for divorce that he realized I was serious. Some couples argue constantly, but our issue was different. He would fight me, push me away, and reject my love, especially when he was struggling. Every situation is unique, and I would never advise anyone to stay in a harmful relationship.”

Evans pointed out that Barker has undergone a significant transformation.

She emphasized, "We are all Christians, and I have instilled in my children the value of forgiveness. All three of my children have forgiven him, and we are now reunited. We thank God every day that our family did not fall apart." She added that she is currently experiencing more joy and contentment than ever before.

The divorce of the duo was officially called off in February 2023, as seen in court records from People magazine.

If you or someone you know is facing domestic violence, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 for confidential assistance.

Editor's P/S:

Sara Evans's decision to reconcile with her husband after his domestic violence arrest is a complex one that has sparked both support and criticism. While Evans emphasizes her belief in forgiveness and her husband's transformation, it is crucial to acknowledge the severity of domestic violence and the importance of prioritizing safety. It is never easy to navigate such a situation, and every individual must make their own informed decision based on their specific circumstances.

It is essential to remember that domestic violence can take many forms, including physical, emotional, and verbal abuse. It can have devastating consequences for victims, including long-term trauma and health problems. It is important for victims to reach out for help and support, and to consider their own safety and well-being first and foremost. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. the potential dangers of staying in abusive relationships and to remember that resources are available for those who need them.